Brexit

This clever little portmanteau combining ‘Britain’ and ‘Exit’, (ooh those people in politics are so clever) has been all over the place of late.

It’s a referendum on the issue of whether Britain should exit the EU. See...clever... I think the fact you would get stamps in your passport for going to France or wherever is a BIG reason to leave. Nothing sadder than going through passport control and not getting a stamp right?

Opinion is pretty much evenly divided on the subj. Here are the main themes that people seem to be fighting over.

Reasons to leave;

• EU red tape/regulations.
• It costs 350m GBP per week to be a member.
• EU environmental regulation is annoying.
• The Common Agricultural Policy (CAP). We pay a lot into this and don’t get much back PLUS we get tripped up by a lot of EU red tape.
• The EU wants to set up it’s own army. This is mental. I suggest brown shirts.
• Being in the EU makes it easier for London to get a terrorist attack.
• Most UK laws are made in Brussels.
• Lower migration would push wages up
• Immigration - anyone in the EU can live and work anywhere. This puts UK public services under a lot of strain. Immigration is one of the hottest items in the debate. But only if you are a moron.

Reasons to stay;

• Prices are lower in the UK as a result of EU membership.
• We would have to contribute anyway to keep access to the single market.
• UK universities receive a lot of funding from the EU.
• If we left the EU energy would be more expensive.
• The UK environment is cleaner because of the EU.
• 73% of UK farming exports are sold to the EU.
• It's safer for the UK to stay in the EU in the face of all the terrorism going on.
• Britain retains a veto in many important legislative areas, and realistically some sharing of legislature is needed for the single market.
• We depend a lot more on the EU market in terms of exports than the other way around
• 3 million jobs in the UK are linked to trade in the EU. The UK gets 66m GBP per day of investment from the EU.
• Immigration is good for the economy.

Big businesses are in favour of staying in because it’s a lot easier for them to operate internationally. Fish are a big ticket item. The UK fishing industry has been crippled by EU regulations to prevent both overfishing and fish puns. As a result, the fish are against Brexit but sadly they don’t have the vote as they can’t hold the mini pencils in the voting booths.

Tampon tax has been another one that’s been big in the news. Due to EU regulations, it’s taxed as a luxury item. Now, while that does not affect me, I don’t use tampons but prefer to employ a highly absorbent stoat called Sebastian, this has been lambasted.  Tampons are quite clearly a necessity if you value soft furnishings.

It's a major and highly complex socio-economic debate that people have studied and grappled with for a while. People have devoted their lives to finding a workable European economy. Wars have been fought over it. Reams of carefully researched political analysis have been written on it. Books have been written. Even if we vote to Brexit (yes it's a verb too!) it will be harder than cancelling a gym membership.

Yet, Cameron has put the decision in the hands of the British public. Which is lucky because recently during a brawl at a football match in Marseille some were chanting, “Fuck off Europe we are all voting out.” Happy then that the future of Europe, the EEC and a major western global economy is in their hands. That’s democracy for you.